They don’t tell you about this part when you’re growing up.

I’m coping with the loss.

But I’m ready to scream about the unbelievable paper chase requirements of the bureaucracy that surrounds dealing with probate, trusts and beneficiary claims.

Since they lived in Ohio in the same house for over 60 years I had to journey there to begin jumping through hoops and chasing down bits of paper that satisfied only the requirements of the bureaucrats.

I made the journey from Oregon to Ohio 3 times in the last three months.

Each time I stayed a week.

Each time I had specific goals in mind.

Each time my goals got delayed by bureaucrats.

For example: Mom bought a new car in 2017. She was 95 and so didn’t use it a lot. The car had only 1055 miles on it when I checked the mileage, VIN number and other data on the bill of sale for her attorney. Best we could tell it was the only thing which would have to go through probate as all else was in a Trust.

The local probate court had a process for simple situations like this and their customer service was absolutely wonderful. I told them what was going on and they assisted me through all the paperwork (16 pages just to make it legal for me to sell the car).

The one thing that threw me was that I had to provide proof that Mom’s funeral expenses had been paid. For that I drove to the Funeral home and got a copy of the paid invoice that noted my daughter had used a credit card to make the payment. But because I was the one who would get the car I had to provide proof that I had in turn paid her. Since she was arriving that evening we put together a letter that was sufficient for the Probate office.

The next day while my Daughter worked on cleaning out the house I went back to the Probate office and was cleared to sell the car. Next I drove to the Bureau of Motor Vehicles to get the title issued in my name so I could make the sale.

The next morning I drove the car to the dealership where Mom had purchased it, negotiated a deal and was told I could pick up the check that afternoon as it would be sent over from their corporate headquarters.

Instead I got a phone call that said they could not cut a check because the title showed my Oregon address.

I agreed to pick up the title the next morning and get the address changed so the deal could be consummated.

The Bureau of Motor Vehicles refused to change the address even though the car had not moved from the dealer’s lot and the title had been issued the day before.

I went back to the Probate office and told them my problem.

Three clerks put their heads together and suggested that we could amend the order to show my mother’s residence address as I was the Trustee and was the current “owner.”

We did the paperwork. The judge approved it

I drove back to the Bureau of Motor Vehicles, provided the new paperwork and they grudgingly gave me a new title for the car.

I raced back to the dealership dropped off the title and sped to the airport narrowly making my flight.

The check is in the mail they tell me.

The Trust is another nightmare. And don't get me started on Life insurance policies. 

I'm just glad I was an only child. The tales I've heard about family squabbles in this situation are mortifying.

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His consulting practice, founded in 1990, is known for Trust-based Brand development, Positioning and Business Development on and off-line.

Consulting: www.JerryFletcher.com
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