Blame shifting never delivers the results it promises

The choices I make are the results of my actions and regardless of how it turns out, it is still my fault. Blaming others for my attitude and situation is not honest or accurate. It is true that some situations are vastly beyond our control. But my choices in those same situations are. I choose my attitude in the situation and I choose how I respond to the situation. Blaming others does not repair the problems I see nor heal the emotions I am feeling.

In order to “move on”, to bring peace back to ourselves it is necessary to take responsibility for our own actions and our own attitudes. When we let circumstances and others dictate our actions and attitude, when we blame others we abdicate control of our own lives. While this might make us feel better, implying that all this bad that has fallen on me is not my fault, it is not in the least true. Again I am not saying nor implying that a lot of the situations we find ourselves in are completely due to our own decisions. Others create situations simply due to the reality that we do not live in this life alone. But I am saying that how we handle them is completely under our control.

When we choose to take responsibility for our own actions and choices, we take responsibility for our choices for the future. We also quit letting others manipulate us and even more, permitting ourselves from blaming others for our poor decisions. I have been guilty of letting the influence of circumstances and others dictate my attitude instead of choosing it for myself. The fault was mine and not another’s. Actions then based off of that attitude are also my fault and again cannot be blamed on others. The way to overcome these rollercoaster rides to disaster is to take charge of the only thing we can, our own choices.

Blaming others for my situation makes me the victim and being the victim means I deserve better. The problem is while we might have been a victim of a situation, part of the choices were ours. Taking responsibility for what is ours leads to healing and improvement. If we remain the victim we never will see or take our opportunities to get out of the trap of blaming others for our situation. We will also never take the opportunities to bring ourselves into a better situation regardless of our physical reality. Life might have improved but our attitudes never will, simply because they are still abdicated to the control of others as we reject that anything is our fault.

We must be honest with ourselves and admit our own choices we our own, weather good or bad. Then we can move on and adapt, we can adjust and once again live a life that we have the chance to smile about. Just because life through you in a hole does not mean you have to stay there. Choose to get out.

Blessings!