Barry Bonds is Not as Helpless as He Feels and Communicates

One of Major League Baseball’s greatest all-time players and the owner of the most home runs in history is feeling the victim of cruel and unusual punishment by the sport he long dominated and loved.

(Barry Bonds, photo courtesy of ABC7 News)

Barry Bonds told The Athletic he feels as though the powers that be in MLB have issued him “a death sentence.”

The 14-time All Star, eight-time Most Valuable Player (MVP) and seven-time Gold Glove winner is hurting, feeling ostracized and exiled.

Strong allegations of steroid abuse and an all too common response of evasiveness or denial about it have been the catalyst for him not being as accepted and loved by the sport, media and a significant amount of fans.

Yet Bonds, who is being denied election by a sufficient amount of voters for election into the National Baseball Hall of Fame despite his undeniable on-field achievements, is not as helpless as he feels and is claiming.

It can be reasonably argued that Bonds is showing that he doesn’t want to do what is expected of him by those who can help him have what he feels he has earned, strongly desires and that to which he likely feels entitled.

Bonds’ behavior seems to infer he wants to be absolved of wrongdoing and the consequences to be ended, without the expected behavioral response to gaining unfair advantage and benefiting.

“At the core we lie to ourselves,” says Cortney Warren, Ph.D., a noted expert on self deception and deceit, “because we don’t have enough psychological strength to admit the truth with the consequences that follow.”

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There is an approach that Bonds, like other players before him who are suffering consequences for violating the integrity of the game, could choose to follow.

Bonds feared no pitcher. He was supremely confident and when necessary, courageous and willing to do what needed to be done to perform at the highest level in the moment.

Yet now, with Bonds not being lavished with praise, respect, reverence and a home in the Hall of Fame, Bonds is lacking the confidence and willingness to accept any challenge.

Unless Bonds is willing to show great courage, dismiss his pride and act in spite of fear of consequences he will be stuck in his current misery.

Only by communicating truth about all that he did to improve his power numbers, exhibit social awareness and empathy to those who are offended and holding his feet to the fire, apologize fully and humbly, with deep and sustained remorse to baseball writers and fans, without any signs of insincerity or manipulation, can Bonds put an end to his suffering and move forward through his crisis and scandal.

If he doesn’t walk that path, his emotions will bring him long-lasting pain, his ego will be tormented and he will forfeit not only inclusion in the hallowed Hall of Fame, he will also forfeit the opportunities and financial benefits that accompany it, for the rest of his life.

Bonds was in essence blackballed from the game while he still had productivity to give because of his mangled reputation.

He became an untouchable, but not as in he couldn’t be harmed but in that he and his reputation was seen as radioactive. He came with a public relations cost too high to be marketable.

He has shown little inclination to tend to it in retirement and is surprised that time, as many believe and hope will solve problems, has not created amnesia, forgiveness or less disdain for his name.

Bonds can hit one last home run by stepping forward with humility and detailing why he did what he did, admitting it was wrongdoing and apologizing fully without excuse making, ask for forgiveness and talk about all he will do to make amends.

Society, generally speaking, is more forgiving than not when people will humble themselves and “do the right thing.”

“We generally avoid examining our contribution to conflict in our lives,” Warren has said. This is natural so Bonds acting this way is not unheard of yet it is preventing the acceptance and inclusion he so dearly wants and is pained by being denied.

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“What does my reaction to this situation say about me,” Warren has asked when people are responding negatively to pain they played a part in receiving.

In the end, the choice is Bonds. He can lessen his suffering or he can do little and continue to endure the consequences, pain and torment. He has a choice and the power to positively affect his future and dreams, and he should realize a truism that Warren has stated.

“Not changing when confronted with the truth is a choice.”

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Bonds has two more years on the Hall of Fame ballot. The clock is ticking.

Does he care?

Will he hold on to false beliefs that he will win out regardless of his response?

Is he inspired to be the Bonds of old, fearful of no one or anything and willing to stand in the batters box and do what needs to be done, succeed and earn cheers and reverence again?

Michael Toebe is a reputation relations and crisis management specialist, serving organizations and high-profile individuals. He writes the Red Diamonds weekly newsletter on Medium and LinkedIn and hosts the short-segment Reputation Talk podcast.