Patrick Scullin

2 years ago · 2 min. reading time · ~10 ·

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“YOUR STUPID LAWS DON’T APPLY TO ME,” SAYS MEADOWS

“YOUR STUPID LAWS DON’T APPLY TO ME,” SAYS MEADOWS

Spineless weasel Rep. Mark Meadows scurries to hide from accountability.
Spineless weasel Rep. Mark Meadows scurries to hide from accountability.

It appears some people are above the law.

Trump’s last chief of staff, Mark Meadows, failed to appear for a Friday deposition before the House select committee investigating the January 6 insurrection.

“I don’t have to do it,” Meadows boasts to The Lint Screen. “I’ve got my head so far up President Trump’s ass that I can see his lungs and out his pie hole. And since I don’t recognize Joe Biden as having won the election, President Trump has given me immunity from any prosecution because he has unlimited power.”

Meadows, who had a spine and shred of character once upon a time, has morphed into a pitiful Trump sycophant and cheerleader. A blemish on the face of humankind.

“I think the president may be the greatest human who ever lived,” Meadows chirps. “And that includes Jesus Christ. Sorry, dude, you were good. I mean, you were a good guy and your miracles were pretty amazing. But let’s face it, Son of God, you didn’t do as much for humanity as Donald J. Trump did. I shall have no false gods before my savior, Donald Trump!

Congressional subpoenas mean nothing to Mark Meadows.

“Screw Congress,” he says. “What do they know about the law? Their subpoenas don’t count. I can do whatever the hell I want. I’m friends with the leader of the free world. And once the boss is back in the big house, I can impose my will on anyone with armed goon squads. President Trump said so. He rewards loyalty, and I’m going to do whatever it takes to prove myself his little bitch boy.”

Meadows laughs. “Laws are for pathetic commoners. I’m royalty. You can’t touch me!”

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Enjoy PD Scullin’s debut novel “SAWDUST: Love is wilder than a circus,” a humorous romp across America with a circus in the early ’80s. You’re a click away from a helluva fun ride. Buckle up and go.

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