Susan 🐝 Rooks, The Grammar Goddess

3 years ago · 2 min. reading time · visibility 0 ·

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Thursday Thoughts: More Conversations -- The Sounds of Silence

Thursday Thoughts: More Conversations -- The Sounds of SilenceI was reading Entrepreneur magazine the other day, and I found an article entitled “Get Better at Everything,” which is the type of article I usually do NOT read because it’s usually trite stuff. You know, stuff that’s been written, rewritten, and regurgitated thousands of times. Blah, blah, blah.

But this one – good for Entrepreneur! -- was better than most.

One idea that struck me was from a sixth-generation funeral director named Caleb Wilde, who wrote a book entitled “Confessions of a Funeral Director: How the Business of Death Saved my Life.” No, I haven’t read it -- yet.

But he made a point in this article about not filling the air with chatter, about being comfortable with silence.

And it struck a chord with me, given that I recently wrote a post about including silence in conversations. As Caleb Wilde wrote: “People need time to collect themselves when they’re confronted with something highly emotional.”

Indeed. And what could much more emotional than being any part of a funeral? Especially for someone dearly loved?

But even when we’re not confronted with that type of emotional hit, we can still learn how to use silence to help ourselves and others. (Caleb Wilde)

The big question is: Are we comfortable with silence?

Is it OK for two (or more) people to sit quietly for a few moments / minutes – whatever it takes – and NOT talk? To reflect on what we might have said or had been thinking … or what the other person might have said / been thinking? Can we allow it to happen, or do we feel compelled to rush into speech, creating noise where once there was silence?

I know I'm a talker, many times talking way too much. I love being alone and living quietly in my small cottage, but something about being with other people brings out the gabber in me. Focusing on using silence to help a conversation be easier for everyone in it is something I'm going to do consciously, deliberately. I need to learn to be comfortable not talking ... I need to focus on listening.

How about you? Do you find yourself talking to keep things moving, to make noise? Do you allow silence to exist in an emotional or business-type conversation? 

Simon & Garfunkle's Sounds of Silence: People hearing without listening. Indeed.

*****

If this post helped you in any way, please share it so others may learn as well. And please comment; it helps you to stand out and you never know who might be interested in YOU. (Just ask Deb Helfrich how well that has worked for her.)

For more posts on topics ranging from American grammar to Friday Fundays, please visit my website: GrammarGoddess.com. Poke around. See what you find. See if there’s anything I can help you with! 

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Comments

Harvey Lloyd

3 years ago #5

I am reluctant to comment as the sound of silence is so pleasing, but..................Silence is a time for reflection. But where ever two or more are gathered silence takes on new meaning. We begin to interpret silence for something other than just experiencing the life force of another. I have just a few people who i can sit in silence and feel the energy of self and others. Your posts reminds me when we do this and sense the growth of relationship between folks who speak silently. SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
"Silence is a source of great strength" - Lao Tzu

Ken Boddie

3 years ago #3

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Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #2

Such a timely and blissful buzz, lovely Susan \ud83d\udc1d Rooks, the Grammar Goddess! I can relate to your admission that 'something about being with other people brings out the gabber in me.' I tend towards 'performing' in public; at least I used to. These days, I'm much quieter than I used to be...maybe I ran out of words? But you make such a valid point that silence is often healthy and helpful. If it doesn't come naturally, then it's an art worth learning, I think. Great thoughts!

John Rylance

3 years ago #1

The Tremloes: Silence is golden But my eyes still Talking is cheap people follow like sheep Though there's no place to go A thought there is no such thing as total silence just varying levels of listening. As I found when I first had hearing aids, you have to relearn how to mask out unwanted sounds and concentrate on those you wish to hear. I'm lucky mine do screen sounds others seem to get a cacophony of sounds. I suppose a form communicating in silence is texting e-mailing etc. Give me talking every time.

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