SPITBALLING TRUMP 2020 CAMPAIGN SLOGANS

Recently the staff of The Lint Screen was approached by a high-powered GOP strategist for ideas on “positioning lines” for President Donald J. Trump’s re-election bid.

While the Big Fella wants to re-run with Make America Great Again (MAGA), some advisors are pushing for Keep America Great Again (KAGA). Both sides agreed to look at some new options. Then, Trump will decide, and others will praise his brilliant decision.

Here are the options TLS brain trust proposed for the Trump/Pence 2020 campaign (should Pence stay on the ticket or be called home during the rapture):

Keep America Kicking Ass (KAKA)

The Best Is Yet To Come, It Will Be Incredible, Amazing, Tremendous! Really, You’re Not Going To Believe How Great It’s Going To Be (TBIYTCIWBIATRYNGTBHGIGTB)  Note: We may need a slightly bigger hat

Re-Elect, Or Immigrants Will Kill You 

Greatness: We’ve Only Just Begun

No Collusion, No Obstruction, No Lie!

You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet

Predictably Erractic

Next Season Will Be Even Better!

More Covfefe, The Best Covfefe

Make America Safe Again (MASA)

Jail Crooked Hillary, Drain Swamp, Build Wall

Still Cleaning Up Obama’s Messes

Bigly & Betterer Than Ever

Pissing Off Allies, Coddling Tyrants 

Let’s See What Happens

Russia, If You’re Listening–– HELP!

Re-Imagine Democracy

Integrity, Character, Honesty. Really!

Cliffhangers Served Daily

There Are More Wars To Fight

No One Tweets Better 

The Best President Ever–– Everyone Says So

The Second Season Is Always Better

Stay Tuned, Just You Wait!

Melania Will Smile In The Second Term

We submitted the slogans along with our invoice. We haven’t heard back yet. We’re excited to hear the final decision!

And to get paid.

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Patrick Scullin (aka PD Scullin) was a founder of ASO Advertising and recently left the ad game to write what he wants, wrangling parts of speech to entertain and amuse.

He has an upcoming novel, SAWDUST, and writes two blogs: The Lint Screen (satire, smartassery humor, pop culture ramblings, and advice for people getting hip replacements) and Empathetic Adman (marketing pontification).