Susan 🐝 Rooks, The Grammar Goddess

5 years ago · 2 min. reading time · visibility ~10 ·

chat Contact the author

thumb_up Relevant message Comment

Reflections on an Unintended Life


As we say goodbye to 2016, some thoughts . . .

A long time ago, in a world torn by war — two people got together and created a life. The woman’s husband was out at sea. She was here, probably lonely. However it happened, she and a man who was not her husband met and had some sort of affair.

Did they mean to? Was it meaningful to them . . . or just a one-night event? We can’t know now. There is no clear path back to those times. But their coming together created a new life. A baby was born.

That baby was me, a child brought into a world who could not be publicly acknowledged. A child whose life might have been so very different from what it has been!

So, as 2016 draws to a close, I’m taking a few minutes to reflect back on this most amazing life and some gifts I have received.

1. I got great genes. So far my health is very good. I don’t take it for granted — although I haven’t always done everything I could to protect it — but so far, so good. I know nothing about my birth parents, but clearly they gave me some very good stuff!

And as I grow older — a true privilege — I am finally taking better care of myself. I’m eating healthier foods. I’m exercising more. I have dogs again, so I laugh a lot more! (See? Sometimes wisdom does come along with age!)

2. I got great adoptive parents. They did something quite remarkable in a time when out-of-wedlock pregnancy was shameful and adoption itself was a hidden topic: They talked to me about adopting me from day one. I have always known I was an adopted child, so there was no ugly “surprise” in later years.

Even better, my parents told me again and again how they had chosen me out of all the other babies who were waiting to be adopted. They built a wonderful story about seeing baskets of babies, all hoping to go home with them, and yet they chose me. That story sustained me all through my childhood, because I always felt special. Who wouldn’t?

Of course, adults know that the process doesn’t work that way, but so what? What else does a child want except to feel loved, cherished, and wanted? I don’t know how my parents knew to do all that, but I will be eternally grateful that they did.

3. I grew up with enough. What do I mean by that? Well, we always had enough of what mattered. Enough food. Enough love. Enough family members. Enough friends.

We were neither rich nor poor, so money was never talked about (at least that my brother and I can remember). We had the smallest house of any of the relatives, but it was still big enough for us. We had a big enough yard to play in. We had a small garden where my dad grew tomatoes and corn (maybe other things). We had enough of the right things.

What a gift all that was! To this day, I feel grateful every day because I know I have enough of what’s important. And I hope you do, too.

I don’t know what 2017 has in store, but I look forward to it. Bring it on!


Thank you for reading my post. I value your comments on this or any of my posts, so please let me know what you think. 

thumb_up Relevant message Comment
You are most welcome, @Alan Culler, and I hope 2017 is a stellar year for you and yours!

Alan Culler

5 years ago #14

Thank you, Susan, for reminding me of two concepts. 1. Gratitude -which I have been focused on lately -even written about, but still have more work to do. 2. Enough -as the Stones said "you get what you need" -looking longingly at what others have is a distraction from helping those who really don't have "enough" to thrive. Happy New Year! and Thank You again. Alan
And you see exactly what I meant and what I live by, Nicole Chardenet! We NEVER had the biggest, baddest, shiniest of anything. Many of my relatives -- all great people as I remember -- had houses that dwarfed ours. One had two staircases (one for family, the other for the staff). My cousins and I had such fun running up and down both, but I look back and realize exactly what that all meant. Wow. I love my small place by the water, all 525 s.f. of it, and I wouldn't ask for anything more. Simple pleasures are all around us if we're looking . . . Happy New Year, and thanks for writing!
Thank you so much, @Ginger A Christmas! And I LOVE enoughness! Wonderful word.

Devesh 🐝 Bhatt

5 years ago #11

Happy New Year. Have read it..have been reminded ans felt great about a lot of things since then. Thank You
Thank you, Paul \, and Happy New Year to ya!
Thanks for sharing my post, Andrew Books! And Happy New Year to you!
Thank you so much, @Prakashan B.V for sharing my post and for your appreciation. I look forward to "seeing" you again in the new year!

Prakashan B.V

5 years ago #7

Susan Rooks...Appreciate sharing with all of us here your wonderful real life story..Splendid..Very well written and toching one..I would like to share this also in our fb group where I share such meaningful articles ...Happy New Yeat..
Thank you, Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee! The same to you.
Thanks, Larry Boyer! It really was remarkable how my folks handled it -- we're talking way back when the whole idea of adoption was hush-hush. I had one acquaintance who was also adopted, but she learned of it by accident when she was an adult. Very ugly and painful for her.
What a wonderful and inspiring story Susan Rooks! I am sure many people in similar situations would be inspired.

Javier 🐝 CR

5 years ago #3

Happy New Year !
Thank you, Joel Anderson. I actually wrote this two years ago on FB, and they showed it to me again (they show us our memories). I can't get over that I have also just written another one on having enough . . . it seems as though I continue to be the same person with the same beliefs. Happy New Year, and thanks.

Joel Anderson

5 years ago #1

Beautifully special in so many ways. All the best to you in 2017.

More articles from Susan 🐝 Rooks, The Grammar Goddess

View blog
10 months ago · 2 min. reading time

Expectations: Lessons Learned from Frozen Food Boxes

I often buy frozen “dinners” because it’s easier t ...

2 years ago · 2 min. reading time

Whoa! Rein it in, partner!

The Internet is a wondrous place, especially for t ...

3 years ago · 2 min. reading time

American Grammar Checkup: Do you see (or hear) what I do?

Where do you get your ideas for articles? Do you s ...