Recently Appointed Brand Ambassador Goes Nuts

You'll notice that there's a lot foreigners on this network. Who knew the Spanish were so inviting?
I certainly didn't, but I don't speak the language.That fact must have gotten lost in the translation.
At first, I was annoyed by the overwhelming appearance of "buzzes" written in the Spanish language.
I don't speak any foreign languages. I've always expected the world to cater to me.
I'm an American, damn it!
I have, however, found myself hitting the brakes while channel-surfing to check out one of the Spanish-speaking soap operas on my cable system.
The women are drop-dead gorgeous and I really couldn't care less what they're saying.
But, for me, that holds true for most women.
I just turn the down the volume on my television, or tune them out, and listen to music.
I figured I could do something similar with beBee, so decided to check it out.

That could explain why I have no female beBuddies, though. That's what I call my followers: beBuddies.
I suppose if I had a female follower, I'd call her a beBudette. But, so far, none have taken the bait. Bummer.
That's right. I admit to being a male-chauvinist pig, so spare me your barbed-tongue comments and don't bother reporting me to the authorities. I've been married and divorced twice, so I've paid the price and earned the right.
However, not all of these foreigners communicate only in Spanish or reside in Spain. They come from all over the world.
Many are bilingual. That means I don't understand half of what they're saying.
I know, I consider it sneaky, too.
They could be plotting to take over the world and I wouldn't know it.  In it's current state, they can have it.
Others appear to be communicating in English, but they can be even more difficult to understand.
For example, I've met two tenured college professors who are deeply involved in research activities. 
One is infatuated with fractions. Its got something to do with similarity and chaos.
I'm horrible at math, so I don't have a clue what he's talking about. What does chaos have to do with fractions? His idea of spicing things up is throwing hydrogen embrittlement into the mix. I don't know if it hurts your teeth, but I had to give up peanut brittle. I do understand one thing he's well-versed in. It's called the complexity theory.
As I said, I've been married and divorced twice. I understand.
The other academic-type creates and then studies drug-dependent rodents when he's not swimming with horses or slipping Bob Dylan into every conversation. I think he was a student of Timothy Leary, but I could be mistaken.
I'm still trying to figure out what language he uses. It sometimes resembles English. It must a hybrid he developed in his bayou-based lab.
If I'd known that I could make a career out of what he does, I wouldn't be wasting my time writing crap like this.
I'm sure you'll agree and wish that I'd known. You've already considered reading this a major waste of time and desperately want to kick me in the nuts. I don't blame you. I get a lot of that.
Then there's the first guy I met. He lives in a rather bland foreign country, but takes great pride in directing a one-man

campaign against Donald Trump. I guess that's his way of spicing things up.
He's managed to meet Bob Dylan, so he can't be all bad. I'll let you decide.
He's also a bit of a gang leader. More on that later.
Then there's an IT geek who resents not being one of the cool kids.
But, it's not for lack of effort. In his spare time, he's a musician and photographer. He likes to take daily walks in the woods, too. I thought that defined every woman's dream date. They always list those attributes on their dating-site profiles. Not that I would know anything about it.
One of the cool kids told me.
He's a foreigner, too, as is the next guy.
He's about to publish a book.
He sat around taking notes while his poor wife battled cancer. Now, he's going to add insult to injury by peddling a tell-all account of the proceedings. She's the one who should be autographing the book. She did all the heavy lifting.
The nerve of some guys.
There's also a traitor in the midst. He's an American who's joined forces with three of the aforementioned foreigners and formed a self-proclaimed think tank appropriately, if not affectionately, referred to as the "Geezers." 
They've begun to publish a weekly discourse where they all agree on something and expect us to find it insightful and follow along. Nice try, fellas. I read it in the restroom.
Their so-called revolutionary concept can be found published under the heading, "Four Curmudgeonly Windbags."
However, the cast of characters on this island of misfit toys, goes well beyond its rank and file membership.

The co-creators of this network, who have a strange affinity for the color orange, keep butting into our conversations.
Can't they be like all the rest and operate like absentee landlords? It's not like we allow our pets to jump on the furniture.
Don't go away mad, just go away. Your equity is safe with us. It's not like you plan to share it or anything.
Then there's the snake oil salesmen they've hired to promote the network to unsuspecting Americans.
They're traitors, too.
One's so full of it, that they set him up in an office overlooking the bull on Wall Street in New York City.
He tries to promote the network by escorting interested parties from bar to bar, gaining nourishment from the free popcorn. He even broadcasts his adventures live on beBee.
Another one lives in Colorado, which is one of the state's that legally dispenses feel-good candy everyday, not just Halloween.
How difficult can it be to persuade people to join a cult when they're stoned out of their minds?
But, seriously folks, everyone who's a part of this affinity-based network has a professional side, too. I've just introduced you to some of their shared interests, which brought us together. That's the affinity connection.
Each and every one is an expert in their field and truly enjoys sharing their knowledge, even with an idiot like me.
Yes, there are plenty of women, too. I just didn't want to embarrass them in this post by discussing their fine washables.
There's about 11 million more of these characters perusing this budding social network and it's growing larger each day. It's being referred to as the next unicorn. That's cute, but not very manly.
So, take a minute and check us out at https://www.bebee.com/ 
Don't worry, apart from me, there's plenty of intelligent life there.
Anyway, I joined the network and I've enjoyed every minute of it. In fact, they just appointed me a Brand Ambassador.
I'll bet they're regretting that decision right about now, if they haven't already. I could be the first bee to have his stinger forcibly removed. Ouch!

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