PUTIN SAYS AMERICANS MUST LET TRUMP FINISH JOB OF MAKING AMERICA GREAT AGAIN
Russia’s President Vladimir Putin encourages all Americans to rally their support for President Donald J. Trump in 2020.
“If Americans want be patriots, they must vote Trump,” Putin tells The Lint Screen. “Donald Trump has done incredible job. He is best president ever. Much better than black Obama.“
Putin has been very impressed by the performance of President Trump.
“He is strong man. He against fake news media. He enemy to enemies of state,” Putin says in clipped English. “Trump for law and order. Bill Barr justice. Trump will bring military and squash agitators like bug. Will demand order. Jail enemies. Kill those opposed to him. Clean up America. Rid country of liberal Biden radicals. Biden bad, bad man. Only Trump make America great! MAGA!!!”
The Russian president thinks Trump has done a “fantastic job” on COVID-19.
“He protect Americans,” Putin says as a white cat jumps on his lap and he pets it. “Pandemic hoax. Will disappear. Trump fights evil science. Masks bad. Distance to others bad. Fast vaccine good. No need for testing vaccine. Too much science. Waste time. No climate change. Science hoax.”
Putin believes President Trump has elevated the position of the U.S. on the world stage.
“Leaders like me, Kim Jong Un, Duterte in Philippines, Xi in China, el-Sissi in Egypt, and Erdogan in Turkey, we all fear Trump,” Putin says with hands waving. “Very scary Trump! Please stop, President Trump. You are so strong. So very smart. So handsome. You have beautiful wife Melania. Please to tell her all your deep secrets. She will keep safe secrets. Tell her everything. Military secrets. Nuclear codes. Everything. Tell Melania. She good woman. And Ivanka hot babe.”
The white cat looks up at Putin’s puffy pink face and swipes his cheek with its razor-sharp claws. Putin throws the cat from his lap, and it scampers away. The Russian leader dabs his bleeding wound with a silk handkerchief and smiles.
“Tell Americans they must vote Trump. He will protect them from radical Joe Biden. Trump wins or else war. America battle America.”
Putin smiles, claps his hands, and dispatches a goon squad to find the white cat and dispense Novichok on its fur.
———————————————————————————————-
Enjoy PD Scullin’s debut novel “SAWDUST: Love is wilder than a circus,” a dark humor romp across America in the early ’80s. You’re a click away from a helluva fun ride. Buckle up and go.
Articles from Patrick Scullin
View blogErnie Johnson may be the perfect template for a Republican candidate. · Dry Cleaner Ernie Johnson wa ...
How could any idiot mistake these for “fan letters?” · Oh, that Donald J. Trump! · Since The Justice ...
Republican bigwigs are upset at The Justice Dept. for dispensing justice against their cult leader. ...
You may be interested in these jobs
-
Mental Health Technician PRN Days
Found in: Talent US C2 - 6 days ago
Oceans Healthcare Amarillo, United StatesDescription · Share Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Email Print At Oceans Behavioral Hospital Amarillo, healing is our focus. We are passionate about helping adults and seniors manage the challenges associated with anxiety, depression and other mental health issues. Utilizing proven, ...
-
Junior Photo/Video Specialist
Found in: beBee S2 US - 1 week ago
Universal Processing LLC New York, United States Full timeAre you ready to go uP? · We are named in Top Workplaces NYC for 2024 · We are one of the winners of USPAACC's Fast 100 Asian American Business awards · We are recognized as one of the Top 5000 in Inc. Magazine's Fastest Growing Private Companies · We are nominated for Best ISO ...
-
Gastroenterology Opening In Southern Chautauqua County, New York
Found in: Lensa US P 2 C2 - 6 days ago
Healthcare United Jamestown, United StatesJob Description · Healthcare United is looking for BC/BE Gastroenterologist that can work alongside two physicians and two advanced practice providers in Chautauqua County, New York , our gastroenterology team provides comprehensive evaluation and treatment for various digestive ...
Comments